&let go.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

I miss my cousin(mother's side) so much(the one in the picture). Kak mira! I lost contact with her and she's really busy now. I've not been contacting her since one and a half month ago. She disappeared just like that. We seldom spend time together due to some family problem(refer to my previous previous month posts . I missed the sweet times we had when we were young. We always do everything together. The first time we went out after not seeing you for 3 years, was last year's december.

CONGRATS TO ALL WHO GOT INVESTED!!!!HELLLOOOO!!!! Okay today was the day we've been so called waiting for. Went to school at 7 to arrange chairs. So hot, that's all i can say!!!! Perspiring like non-stop. Had to do crowd control. Me and Vanessa was like "Can you all please hurry up" again and again. The only word we said was "hurry up" all the time. We stood at the gate and kept on saying the same thing. Pray services was first then investiture. Scary to the max man!!! My heart was beating so fast while walking(afraid that i might trip on my own feet) haha. So then we rushed like hell in the changing room. Perspiring all the time. Then time for our group to perform. As usual of course scared and kinda screwed up on the turning part. DONE. Changed again like a mad woman, rushing for time afraid that we might be late to go out of stage. Then our group's turn to go out. Then investiture ended. *Phew*

The class commitee item was good too!!! Seriously!!! Very groovy!!! Then went to MPR2 for reception.Haha. The food was awesome man!!! Went for second round for the food. I was superbly hungry. Then went class and took photos then went to the hall back for Earth Day concert. It's one month after the actual day of the earth day(22/4/08). So there was some performances. Teachers dancing, HOD stuff singing, Ms Martens singing with her"Awesome Aunties", drama performance, student dancing and the nuns singing some italian song. Ms Karen Kang sang too!!! It was alright lah. Ms Martens stopped like so many times just because they never rehearse with the piano and in the end sang without the piano because she say Ms Zhang is too professional for them. Wth. Arranged chairs in class for tmr's parents-teacher session. Went home and here i am. SO BORING!!!!!!!!

I don't know what's happening around me. I can' take it anymore. Im currently down. Feeling pretty low. Understanding is the thing. I can like kill myself, hurt myself anytime i want. That's what you want? You was like this at first but then changed to another thing next. Why? I just wished you aren't like that. Why can't you be like other parents? I need you by my side when problem striked me but you're not. I just wish one thing. I just want you to be like other parents. Nagging and scolding is not the way to discipline your children because you say that's the way to discipline me. So do violence. At least give me some freedom which i never get!!! Can you?

This is my other cousin(father's side). Kak Rabia! Haha. She said the picture look so ugly but it's okay. So today is her birthday and i would like to wish you a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for being there for me and always lend your ears. You are the one that i can tell my secrets!!! Hahaha. Shhhh. Hope your day will be a wonderful one!!!Suddenly i miss my cousins soooooooooo muuuuuuucccccch. That's what you will always feel when you are close to someone. It's been 2 and a half months since we met. Haha. Okay so hope this coming June i will be able to meet you guys okay!!!??? Haha. Here are my cousins:

This are the ones that im closest to. I've alot more cousins kay! Seriously like alot more! Wanna know how many cousins i have on my father's side? 19. So my grandma has 21 grandchildren! Believe it or not!!! My father's family is really big okay!Haha. The two boys behind are just spoiling the picture!!! IDIOT!!! They are my cousin and brother.

Happy holidays

Gd Luck for your Results!!!

what we could have been, 2:50 PM.